Joy that holds you up when life feels dark
Church, as we step into this Christmas season, I want to speak straight to the place that gets tired of pretending. The place that smiles on Sunday but wrestles on Monday. Pastor Larry kicked off our new series, Joy in Christmas, with a truth that cuts through the noise: joy is not a fragile emotion that rises and falls with circumstances — joy is a steady light that holds you up when life feels dark.
And here’s the shift we all need: it’s the Christ in Christmas that makes this season joyful. Not the food, not the plans, not the presents, not the perfect family photo. Christ.
The joy of Jesus is deeper than comfort
Jesus Himself shows us what joy really is. He said, “My meat is to do the will of Him that sent Me, and to finish His work.” (John 4:34) Joy rooted in obedience, not comfort.
Then He looks at His disciples (and at us) and says something bold: “These things have I spoken unto you, that My joy might remain in you, and that your joy might be full.” (John 15:11) That means complete joy is possible… and it also means it’s possible to belong to God and still live without it.
Pastor Larry made it plain: joy doesn’t come from doing what you want or getting your own way — joy comes from doing what God wants. The Kingdom life isn’t about chasing the next “thing” that will finally make you feel full.
Scripture says, “For the kingdom of God is not meat and drink; but righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost.” (Romans 14:17) Some of the disappointment many believers carry comes from valuing the wrong things — wanting joy on our terms, or treating joy like a soul-experience instead of a Spirit-produced reality.
Personal reflection is where joy gets real
So Pastor Larry didn’t just preach at us — he invited us to the table of the Lord, to lay ourselves down in personal reflection. And honestly, this is where joy gets real. Because joy doesn’t grow in a heart that refuses to be honest.
David prayed, “Search me, O God, and know my heart… and lead me in the way everlasting.” (Psalm 139:23–24) That prayer takes courage. It means I stop defending myself long enough to let God heal me. I stop blaming people long enough to let God shape me. I stop performing long enough to let God transform me.
A teachable spirit protects your joy
Then came the heart of the message — one of the most overlooked “ingredients” of joy: a teachable spirit. Because an unteachable spirit doesn’t only steal your joy, it opens the door to self-deception. If I can’t be corrected, I can’t grow. If I can’t be challenged, I can’t be changed. And if I can’t be changed, I will keep repeating the same cycles — just with new excuses.
Here’s the question Pastor Larry put in front of us: when you listen to a message — or even a conversation — do you listen for validation, or do you listen for growth? A teachable person stays grounded in identity in Christ (not ego), stays open to being moulded, and stays willing to be stretched so their capacity increases.
Let’s do one simple heart-check together. Not to shame you — just to help you get free:
- Where have I become defensive when God tries to correct me?
- Who do I resist listening to because I don’t “like” how they say it?
- What truth do I already know… but I keep postponing obeying?
- Where have I confused being “right” with being Christlike?
- What would change this week if I chose humility over control?
Pastor Larry named some warning lights of an unteachable spirit: impatience, insecurity, easily offended, a lack of empathy, bitterness, being disruptive and self-absorbed, and living like a consumer instead of a giver.
If you see yourself there, don’t run. Bring it into the light. Joy doesn’t fear exposure — joy gets stronger in honesty.
God corrects what He loves
And here’s the hope: God does not point things out to push you away. He points things out to pull you closer. He corrects what He loves. He prunes what He plans to grow. Pastor Larry reminded us that a growth mindset sees challenges as a training ground, not a dead end.
Family, this is how we prepare for Christmas with clean hands and a soft heart: we let Jesus be Lord, not just Saviour. We let the Spirit produce joy deeper than mood. We become teachable again, before God and before one another, so His joy can be completed in us.
How do I do it?
This week, take 10 minutes a day to pray Psalm 139:23–24 slowly and honestly. Then choose one relationship where you will practise teachability — listen to learn, not to win.
If you want to stay connected with what God is doing in our family, visit our website. Also, don’t miss this powerful resource on relationships and Spirit-led marriages — share it with your spouse, your friends, your small group.
Prayer
Father, we come to You without masks. We don’t want surface joy. We want Your joy —complete joy— rooted in Jesus and alive in the Holy Spirit. Search us, Lord. Show us where pride has hardened us, where offence has trapped us, where bitterness has stolen our tenderness.
Give us teachable hearts. Make us quick to repent, quick to forgive, quick to listen, and quick to obey. Heal what we’ve hidden. Restore what we’ve lost. And as we move toward Christmas, centre us again on Christ — the One who is our peace, our strength, and our joy. In Jesus’ name, amen.
